Chapter 5: Day Off.

Two weeks and a few days have gone by and today is my day off from work. Its 4:54 on a Thursday morning, I wake up before the noises of the constructions begin invading the peaceful quietness of the city. I rush in the toilet to relieve myself, after emptying my bladder I wash my hands in a rush and quickly return in my bedroom and kneeled for my daily devotion. A quick pick at the watch on the wall and it’s exactly 5AM.

“Father God, I just want to thank you for waking me up this morning, I slept as if I was dead but you put in me the breath of life and the strength to wake up, you renew your grace in my life every morning and you always keep me away from sinning against you oh Lord, father God, I know that I am nothing without you and that I’m worthless far from you, therefore I ask for your protection today as I go about my day, I ask for your Holy Spirit to be present in everything I do today”

I pray as best as I know how and by formulating sentences that I’ve picked up here and there from the people I believe of being highly spiritual mature than me. So, I pray and prayed some more.

Convinced that I am at least in my 45th minutes in the presence of the Lord as I come to the end with an Amen, I curiously glance at the watch on the wall again. To my big surprise it's only 5:24.

The disappointment files my thoughts following by questions.

“25 minutes? Really?” … “Well at least it’s better than the other days, I’ve improved by 10 minutes, so I shouldn’t complain. Shoot! If anything, I should be thankful”

I try remaining positive as I reach for my phone and unplugging it from the charger to read the words from my bible app.

“Let see here… what to read today…. mmh… haa Psalm 119… the longest chapter in the Bible, this should add up more time”

As a new believer, 7 months in the Lord now and after hearing the pastor preaching about how morning prayer is important and how the minimum time should at least be one hour each day. It’s like a new challenge to me. But it’s been 3 weeks now that I’ve manage to wake up every morning to keep up with my devotions, sometimes I find myself hitting the snooze button at least 2 or 3 times just to get those extra minutes of sleep, which always leads to few minutes of tardiness in starting my prayers. I want to be faithful; I want to be diligent and I want to be true to myself. The good thing is I’m doing this by my own will, nobody is forcing me to wake up in the morning, nobody is pushing me to read my bible and nobody is dragging me to go to church. Just the thought of realizing that hell is real, heaven is also real. I don’t want to end up in hell but there are things to do, path to follow and a price to pay to end up in heaven, that’s what I’m doing now, paying the price, I don’t share the same opinions with those who say “heaven is free”. . . my biggest fear is to backslide to the man I used to be and one of my biggest weakness is and has always been women, maybe one day I will overcome that but that seems to be just wishful thinking for the time being. I still struggle with dark thoughts, sometimes perverted.  So far I’ve been living only by grace I would say, but in my old days I made a lots of acquaintances and a few have become friends, friends that gets on my last nerve from time to time and most of them mock my sudden change. But it’s all good, I have no regrets.

“I have strayed like a lost sheep. Seek your servant, for I have not forgotten your commands. Amen”

*BUZZZ. Buzz. BUZZZ*.

I culminate the last verse of the psalm 119 and in which the buzzing of my phone alarm that is sets to 6AM spring from. With one swift of my thumb, I turn the alarm off. At this time I’m usually in the shower getting ready for work but today, it’s going to be a good day, I don’t have work and no plans as far as I know, so I decide to go back to bed and take advantage of this day off.    

As seconds’ morphs into hours, I wake up from a 4-hour nap, it's 10 AM and the city is full of noisy constructions, which are the price you pay for living in a place like Toronto. Constructions are everywhere.

I yawn while checking if I have any notifications or miss calls on my phone at the same time, the phone is dry. Somehow when I’m off, that’s when people don’t need me, but when I’m at work and busy, that’s when people feel the urge to reach out to me… such is live.

Gazing through my phone into the music app and click on the song: *when Jesus says yes nobody can say no* which start to play through my Bluetooth speakers.

Hop in the shower and singing along to the melody, skipping the lyrics that are unknown to me or that I haven’t fully memorized. The steam from the hot shower is getting thicker and thicker in the washroom as I stand beneath the water dripping on my face, finding its way to my chest, my back, and my butts along with my genitals and continue its ways to my feet.  Knowing that I have nothing to do today is such a relief, so I decide to take a longer shower up to the minutes.

After my 40 minutes shower, I come to find 2 miss calls, 11 messages from my WhatsApp group and a text message from sister Tabby Mubzi from church and it reads: [[Tabby Mubzi: Hey Dan, I’m not sure if you are aware but the convention starts today at 7PM, so let me know if you’re coming, we can go together cause I’ll be in your hood lol ttyl]] . To which I reply right away: [[oh shoot, I totally forgot about that, LOL @ “my hood”. Cool I’ll let you know by 3PM ight?]]. [[Tabby Mubzi: ya np]], she retorts after few seconds and I switch to WhatsApp to see what my boys are talking about. The conversation went along something like: [[Ludovic: Yo who’s reaching woodbine beach this afternoon to play soccer?]]

[[Charles: count me in]]

[[Ricky: what time exactly are we talking about?]]

[[Claude: I’m down]]

[[Charles: let’s meet @4pm, should be there early still]]

[[Ricky: iight I’ll keep you posted by 3 but I should be able to make it]]

[[Em’s: are there gonna be girls? lol]]

[[Claude: lol]]

[[Charles: lol well we’re going to the beach, I think there should be at least few girls jogging around, I wouldn’t worry that much lol]]

[[Em’s: hahaha you never know, alright I’m down]]

[[Ricky: lol that’s funny @ Em’s]]

[[Em’s: yo pastor Dan, getcho ass up, are you coming? Lol I can see you’re online, no excuses]]

[[Ricky: he’s probably at church again lol he became forever church boy lol]]

[[Em’s: lol smh that’s sad man. See why I hate churches? Can’t even have fun no more. Terrible]]

To which I reply [[ lol I got things to do man, I have plans already made fam]]

[[Charle: plans to go to church? Lol… yo you're at church 24/7 man. That’s not normal.]]

[[Ricky: he’s trying to be a pastor lol]] to which they all laugh in the group chat

[[Charl: that’s good business bro, we should open a church of our own, just put me as the money keeper lol]]

They all laugh again; I directly switch subject with. [[you know what, I’m gonna be there, I got few minutes to school you kids on how the game should be played. Y’all can call me Neymar. ]]

[[Em’s: hahaha Neymar my ass lol]]

Looking at the time, “yo man, where the heck is Ricky?” a frustrated tone comes out of Charles’s mouth, as we are all here at the beach, all except for Ricky. The brightness of the sun keeps our eyes hostage behind our dark shades at the sounds of children playing in the sand, making castles, and the noises of music that marinates with shouts of volleyball players. The dazzling sunlight reflection on the lake and the gorgeous baby blue sky can only make a way for a warm breeze swirl around us. 15 minutes has passed by. I’m in my and1 shirt and a white V-neck t-shirt. “Dan why are you wearing and-1 for? This ain’t basketball” Em teases while guzzling on a bottle of water. “Don’t worry about what I’m wearing, the clothes don’t make a man, worry about how I’m about to ruin your day on that soccer field boy” I shot back at the same time putting my black turf shoes on. “ya whatever man, talk is cheap” he replies and “there’s bottle of water here if anybody want some” he informs us, “I’ll take one” Ludovic and Charles request at the same time, and Em’ tosses one bottle to each.

“Braise yourselves boys, Ricky is here, can we start this damn game now?” Claude exclaimed as Ricky walks to meet us. “sorry guys I’m late, just ran into David and his aunty at the mall” he explains as he greets each one of us with props. “So? That’s no reason to be late” Em interrupts, “haha chill bro, he wanted me to check out the engagement ring he just bought his girl” Ricky elaborates. “whaaat? Hold up, hold up, hoool’d uuup. He trynna put a ring on Tiya?” Charles asks surprisingly, “ya fham, he’s trynna put a ring on it before she leaves the country in like a week or two.” Ricky elaborates as he put down his sport bag.